HELP!! my 25 y/o H walked out... maybe mlc? HELP!!

[darkestangel]

Thanks for the kind words, guys.
At this point, I don't even know what I want. I don't know if I want this marriage, or not. Sometimes I think that the damage done is just beyond repair, but then I think about how short our separation has been so far, and how some of you have been through way worse, for much longer.

Funny how backsliding is the rule, rather than the exception.

Saturday, H came by to pick up D for the weekend. I did good, being somewhat distant yet still chitchatting. The night before I had made turkey meatload, which H loves, so i offered him the leftovers, which he happily took home.

Then he walked into the bedroom, where my computer was on. D@mn myspace! He saw my profile, and again made the comment, "Hey- look at your new profile. I haven't seen it before, because YOU took me off your Friends List."

I was ticked off that he keeps bringing it up, because I haven't brought up any of the horrible mean things he'd done to me (like the OW, for starters, or leaving us), but he gets upset over a little myspace thing like that. So I said, "Well, this is what you wanted. We have our seperate lives. I am your STBXW, and you are my STBXH. We're not friends, so I took you off." (Truth is, I took him off because of some obscene bulletins he posted.)

He says, "We're not friends? I thought we were friends."
I said, "Friends trust and respect each other."
He said, "I don't trust and respect you?"
I just about fell out of my chair.

How has any of his actions over the past 2 months reflected any amount of respect to me? It's almost like saying that he wants us to be friends, because then I'm not the ex-wife, I'm not the person he hurt. He doesn't want to acknowledge that person. He just wants everyone to be happy, and avoid anything that reminds him that we are married.

He still hasn't brought up actually doing any of the paperwork, he hasn't brought up the subject of divorce for over a month. He doesn't bring up the subject. Should I?

I am contemplating going dark. He's already living at his moms (has been since he dropped the bomb), I only see him when he picks up/ drops off D. And actually, because my new job needs me top be available Monday afternoons, I'm going to have to enroll D3 in daycare 5 days a week instead of 4. So, instead of dropping her off with me on Mondays, he'll be dropping her off at daycare. So we'll only cross paths when he picks her up on Saturdays.

Do you think that change will help or hurt? I have to do it, there's no other option.