This link offers information about Passive/Aggressive behavior. It's a term I often used in the past when tyring to put a label on the way my H was acting.
I'd forgotten about it, recently however, because there wasn't much in the way of "passive" behavior while we discussed Divorce.
But, now that we are "Piecing", and we've laid down the big guns, the little weapons we used to use are again available.
Yesterday, H came up and hugged me from behind. (Mind you, I was leaning over the trash can...) but.... I didn't push him away, nor did I turn around to hug back. A minute or two passed after the hug and H said sarcastically, "Gee, thanks for the hug... that was the best hug I ever got...".
That feeling... that "ugh... this feels really familiar" feeling... came over me. I shook it off, came back in and gave H a nice long hug.
I'm thinking THIS is one of the BIG things that has to change. This kind of statement is designed, subconsciously or not, to make me feel like I'm NOT DOING SOMETHING RIGHT, like I'm bad or EMOTIONALLY DEFECTIVE...
So, gang... Maybe you can help me turn the BIG goal, that "H will stop passive/aggresive behavior", into action statements that concern ME. Any input, as always is most appreciated .
I see what I can do to help on the link above. Do any of y'all have experience in this kind of thing? Overcoming it in either yourself or your mate?
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