Loving a WAS isn't easy

[BryanR]

MMB,

Thanks for the post and the comments. I get strength to do this from each and everyone of you who offer me support. I AM going to do this.

I understand that Sandi was trying to help me, but I have already been down the road of doubt and pain. I don't really care what is happening so much as moving toward the ultimate goal of putting my family back together. Sandi may be right and it may be a longer road that I was hoping, but you know, every day that she is gone is longer than I was hoping for.

I am going to hang in there and take whatever pain is dished out to me and continue to fight for my family. Sure, I have my days of darkness, gloom and doubt, but I also have the times where I see a light at the end of the tunnel. It is faint but it is there. I just pray that it isn't an oncoming train. LOL.

I know that something changed my W and that I had a part in it, but I also know that while she is hurting she can know that I will stand committed to her and our family. Her faith (or lack there of) in me is of little consequence at this point. I can tell her what I will do until I am blue in the face and it won't mean a damn thing unless I live it.

So stand back and watch me. I WILL do this. The survival of my family depends on it.

-B