This evening W asked me 'what to do for dinner'. As I was thinking about it, her phone played the 'you got a text message' song. I stopped for a moment and said "I don't have any ideas" and left the room.
She said 'ok, well I'll ask D12' as I walked away. I went to my office to calm down. A few minutes later I came out and was going to say something about the text messaging. Something like 'I see you still have no moral issues with having an affair with a married man?'.
She was going to her car, and stopped when I walked out. I thought better of what I was going to say and instead said 'What did you decide to get for dinner?'. She said she had no idea and was going to 'look for some fish'. Then she said "That's not why you came out here". I said "I was going to say something trite but I think that would be a bad idea.". Then I asked her what store she was going to.
She did't blink or anything, just kept on the conversation about dinner. Then she left to go to the store. -- I logged on to our wireless account and looked at the text message send/recieve logs.
Her 'friend' texts her every morning at about 5:30 am or so. Usually 2-3 texts. Then in general there are 3-4 exchanges during the day. There are also short 1-3 minute phone calls. Usually 2-3 each day. Some days there are 10-15 minute phone calls. Never a phone call on Sunday. But there are text msgs.
This is the same pattern that went on when she was pursuing OM 2 years ago. E-mails, short phone calls. It took about a month before she 'broke' him and he professed his undying love. The rest we all know.
Now, I've thought about these messages. Could it just be 'innocent banter? Why does he send 2-3 messages every morning at 5:30 am or so? Forwarding a 'thought of the day' he receives overnight?
The only reason I need to know the answer is because I want to be SURE when I tell her that carrying on an affair while LIVING IN MY HOUSE is unacceptable and I want her out ASAP.
The only way I can be sure is to check her phone when I can get access to it and see what her sent messages say, assuming she isn't deleting them now.
--
When I came back from a long walk and had dinner I was pleasant, coordial. She was depressed and seemed angry. She asked me if we were taking separate cars to the comedy show tonight. I said 'no, why would we?' She didn't give a reason. A little later she was lying on the bed upstairs. Seemed very depressed, irritated.
I was very nice.
So, I'm not going to do anything until I have some more information about this situation. Maybe it IS some weird 'friendship'.
Either way, it's going to be no fun. If it's a real EA, she has to go. The kids will be devastated but she can't have her cake and eat it too. Not this time.
