I can talk till I am blue in the face, the reality of the situation is that my happiness is still very much controlled by my W's actions. The weekends are worse because that is when historically we spent the most time together as a family. It kills me (ok that's a little strong) that I am not included in her plans. Yesterday we went out for supper as a family (she met us at the restaurant). D7, stepdaughter17 (SD17) and myself. When W came in, she kissed everyone but me...same thing when she went to bed and this morning when she left. I may be putting too much importance in these kissing episodes.... it is difficult for me to accept that she would rather spend Friday night with her mother rather than with me. PMA not very present today. Need to shake this off. It is at times like this that I feel like saying F*** this. I don't deserve this....nobody does.
