Hey Brit, This is so WAW like. Family pass????? I'll show you a family pass.....sorry about that. These WASs are so out in left field sometimes......I guess you should have validated and went out to purchase the family pass and maybe got matching bathing suits or workout gear!!!!!!! Can you tell I am reaching the end of my rope.
Well, I got a call back from one of the therapists I called yesterday and W has an appt tonight at 6pm. I called W to find out if she wanted to go and I got "I guess if you think I need to go, I'll go". Tuesday morning and even last night she was okay with the idea - Today she's all pissed off because I brought it up. Oh well. She said she's going tonight, so I guess we'll see how it goes...
Forgot this - Last night W was talking about going to the YMCA and signing up for a pass or something. I suggested she gets one for D too, then they can both go swimming or whatever. W then asks if we should get a family pass if I wanted to do stuff there too. wtf?
How did you not say "DUH" when she said she would go if you think she needs to?
Amazing how they constantly confuse us as to if we are a family or not.
How did you not say "DUH" when she said she would go if you think she needs to?
I really wasn't sure what to say - If I tell her I wanted her to go, will she resist out of spite, or if I say I don't care, or don't think she needs to do, am I considered uncaring?
In any case, she went and she was happy enough when she got home - She had obviously been crying, but I've not asked about it or even brought it up. I figure if she wants to talk to me about it, she will.
Hopefully she will continue to go and get something out of it.
Understandable - This crap gets old pretty quick. My W has been moping around for the last week like someone just drove over her cat. I can barely squeeze a conversation out of her, much less get her to do anything to help herself.
On the plus side I just got phone + cable service setup at my new house, and I'm supposed to get the keys tonight. Wooh!
I still have no idea what to do with W from day to day. She doesn't really do much with me anymore (less than she did a week or two ago even), but she doesn't resist things that I do - Still hasn't mentioned her C appt yesterday, but hopefully she had the sense to make another one while she was there. Who the hell knows anymore...
I left work and headed out to pick up D and then come home (W's house) via my new place to get the keys. I had talked to W occasionally during the day, but I only got one word answers, so I figured she didn't want to talk. Big deal. She called me on my way home all bright and happy. I asked her if she was going to take a nap while D and I were out at dinner (Thursday is our dinner together night - just me and D). She said she didn't feel as tired, so I asked if she wanted to come with us - In the last five months she has come with us once, and it took some persuading, so I wasn't expecting much. Anyway, she decided to come along, but I suggested we go somewhere else to eat than D's usual since I was getting bored with that - W said that was fine.
I get home with D, W is all happy and friendly, we change D, head out to dinner. On the way W start complaining about people and how 'everyone annoys her'. Been there before - It's not everyone, but 'someone'. Turns out OM spend most of the day talking to her about his ex-gf or gf (W wasn't able to describe exactly what she is), but she really complained about him and how childish it all was.
W always goes out with people from work on Thursday night - They have a soccer game, then they hang out and drink for a while. I've seen her drive through a snow storm to get there. Tonight, she didn't go - I even suggested she went just for the 'hang out' part, but she still hasn't gone.
No idea what to make of any of it. Dinner was great together, went to Wal-mart afterwards and had fun. W was really friendly to me all night and even picked out some things at Wal-mart for me that she thought I would like.
Just keep doing what you're doing Brit. You stay consistant while she rides the roller coaster!
Yep - We're both took the day off work, since we were going to check out a new day care for D that is closer to where we're both living now. W is still fast asleep in bed, so I'm not sure if we're going to make it or not. I'd rather she get some rest and maybe start to feel normal again, but we also need to get D moved
Oh well. I guess we'll see what happens. Maybe I'll ask W out to lunch and see if she has anything she wants to talk about. I know she is freaking out about money and she's very depressed and lost right now. It's pretty sad really - My W always enjoyed so much, but now she doesn't seem to like anything at all.
Yeah roller-coaster, yo-yo, etc...sux...I'd say that any quality time you are spending together is good. Keep it up. This kind of contact has got to be good. Just try not to let the ride get you to far up, down, or nauseated...lol
Yeah roller-coaster, yo-yo, etc...sux...I'd say that any quality time you are spending together is good. Keep it up. This kind of contact has got to be good. Just try not to let the ride get you to far up, down, or nauseated...lol
It's as confusing as hell - You never know what to expect one day to the next.
Yesterday was okay. W ended up ready after noon, so we went to check out the new day care and got lunch together. W had a girly dr appt afterwards, so I stayed home and did laundry and stuff while W went to do that. We did our usual Friday evening dinner with D and ran some errands together.
So, W offered to help me do some painting and stuff at my new place and last night said she'd go over with me today and do some cleaning and help me organize things. Even suggested that we get D's bed setup quickly so she can take her nap there and we can work on stuff while she's sleeping.
Last night W was pretty frustrated - Lots of slamming her laptop lid and sitting quietly. I was keeping busy, so I didn't sit around watching her, but I knew she was feeling 'off'. So, when we went to bed I figured I'd see if she'd open up - I just told her "I hope you're happier once I'm back in my own place". I half expect to get a comment about guilt trips and stuff. But no, I get a "It's not you - It's, um, everything else. You've really helped out a lot and I appreciate it". Managed to get to the point where she admitted to being very unhappy and she wasn't sure if she'd 'be happy' ever. She said that I seemed very happy, but the conversation moved along before I got chance to respond. A big plus was that she said she had another C appt on Tuesday - I didn't pry into what they talked about, but she said it went 'okay'.
This morning W was very friendly and even let me cuddle with her in bed - I got up with D so W could get some extra sleep. W told me I could sleep in tomorrow, so she must be expecting that I'll stay here tonight with her.
So, I guess I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place right now - Part of me wants (and really needs) to back off from W and spend less time with her. On the other hand, I know she's a mess right now and she has already admitted that she doesn't expect anyone to help her with things if I don't. So what do I do? She obviously wants the support structure that comes from an R with me, but isn't ready for the rest.
Good morning Brit, I continue to say the same things but it is very difficult to live under the same roof and detach lovingly. I know exactly how you feel. Like you some days I feel like things are going in the right direction but our high expectations (things getting back to normal) don't allow us to enjoy the moment. You cuddled this AM. and let W sleep in....that is great when you compare that to most of us on these boards. My suggestion is to spend a little time away from W doing something you enjoy...maybe with your D.....then spend a little time with your W because let's be honest that is what we all crave to do.
