So how do you guys do it? My self-esteem plummeted when my H stopped wanted to ML. I feel completely confident and alive at work. When I come home, it's a different story. I feel almost worthless as a wife. I feel great as a mom! But I don't feel sexy, wanted, desired, as a wife. As I'm sitting here thinking about how to raise my self-esteem, what comes to mind is just forgetting it all and working on myself. But when I do that (which I've tried in the past), that's when I grow distant from our relationship, when I focus on myself, and when I'm "done" w/ our marriage. I don't want that! I want it to work. I realize that I can't motivate him to change, I realize that I'm the only one that can affect my self-esteem, but what I don't realize is how to do it w/out hurting him and our marriage.
In the past, I've tried to let him be. Not push him to change, let him move at his own pace - and he didn't move - at all. We got absolutely no where, and this is when I cheated on him (this was all before we got married).
It just feels hopeless. I'm so sorry that I sound like such a "Debbie Downer". I really appreicate all of your comments! This is the first time that I've actually had someone to talk to outside of a counselor, and it feels good to get it off my chest w/out my H there. I feel like I can't be 100% honest b/c H doesn't know that I cheated on him. Maybe I should start going to a counselor myself. . .
Kellie ------ Me - 27 H - 31 S - born 8/18/2007 Married - 4/24/2005 Together - 7/03/2002
