PF - there is resentment on both sides in these situations, and I agree with you that it is hard to let it go. My H did take his turn to initiate last night. It was not the best experience I've ever had but not the worst either. I start feeling the resentment and anxiety moreso afterwards (which may explain the long lag between ML), but this time I started thinking about his good points and my DD. It helps me.
The taking turns thing may be a good trick for us. We are both competitive spirits and their is now the feeling of...oh don't let it go longer than the other did. I don't know...we'll see.
I didn't mean for this thread to turn into a rant on my H. I know he's not perfect...neither am I. He does have a lot of good qualities and it's easy to lose them admidst the struggles and stresses of our daily life.
I'd really love to know how others build passion - block aversions - whatever. I want to be able to enjoy LM as much as possible for me at this point in time. I've read everything - honestly. I like the High Conflict Relationship book as it has exercises to help bring a couple closer. We are trying - both of us. I hope it lasts. I'm sure there will be setbacks, but at least we keep trying.
