Having a hard time

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I have painted as well, looking to re-paint just about everything again. Had a marathon session with H last night. Crying, throwing up, etc. Among other things he told me that I have to think of him as "dead" and go on with my life, making it the best for the kids. Talked about lowering my $ so he can have a life too. Talked of the various ways to do that. Kept telling him that any change will cause me to have to make major changes, i.e. sale of the house, to survive. He doesn't believe it. Wants me to run figures for him - figures I already have given him. I basically implied I won't-and I won't. Told him he would just share it with his people and he would be advised that I am lying and would be fine. Sorry, bills are my problem now and I have my own people.

Says he isn't greedy and only wants what he is entitled to. Perhaps after all the kids have moved out I will re-mortgage and give him his share of the house. But in my thoughts, perhaps someone has had experience, let's say he owns 40% of the house to be paid after kids are out. Shouldn't he therefore have to pay 40% of the maintenance, yearly taxes, homeowner's insurance, etc? How is it that he gets a lump share of the house but has to pay none of the bills? He says now that 1/2 of his payment is 1/2 of the mortgage and the kids medical costs. He seems to forget I also pay for his as well. So with those things his money is spent. Where is the support there? Fair is all I keep saying and this is none of that!