It's my understanding that infidels very often "trade down." Something about "control." Choc.
Choc - Very interesting about the Control part. My H always encouraged me to do this or do that, whether it meant applying for a better job or just going out with friends. However, when it came down to it, he never seemed happy if I did get the job or I did go out with friends. It always seems like I never make the right decision in his mind. That's his way to control. The best example is he really pushed me to get the position I have now. It pays better, has more responsibility...etc. He really encouraged me. A month & 1/2 after we moved to MN (where the job is located), he got down about having difficulty finding a job. I emailed him one day. My email has my "signature and title" automatically built into it. He completely shocked me by degrading me and really ranted and raved about how I thought I was something special because of my new title. Crazy!
The OW in our sitch. is trying desperately to get out of a M and be, as she calls it "Just OW" and not to be controlled. Good luck with that!
SueS
ME: 42, H: 42, D6 Together: 18 yrs. Married: 15 yrs. Attended Retrouvaille - December 2009 Status: Working on it day by day
