SM: What does it mean when someone says they want to do something, but then they don't actually do it?
Lil: It means they don't want to.
SM: So you believe all action is governed by conscious intent?
Certainly I don't believe all action is governed by conscious intent, and that's not a logical conclusion to draw from what I said. I DO believe when someone wants to do something, they GENERALLY do it, and when they don't, they GENERALLY do not. Of course, people can be torn, ambivalent, etc., but if something is important to someone, they generally figure out a way to do it.
In the book "He's Just Not That Into You," the author addresses the subject of guys (in this case) who make excuses (and women who accept the excuses) for why they haven't called. "He's busy," "he travels a lot," "he's taking care of his mom/kids/house/job/dogs/ferrets." The fact is, if a guy wants to talk to you he will call you. If he doesn't have time, he will make time. He will find a way, because it is important to him, you are important to him, he wants to talk to you, talking to you is the high point of his day.
She's not calling the C because she doesn't want to. If it were important TO HER, or by implication, if YOUR REASONS were important to her, she would do it. Sorry, but that's the way I see it. You've been accepting her excuses for TEN YEARS.
