Originally Posted By: shadows lost
I wasnt looking for OW it just kinda happened.

that's pretty much what everyone who has an affair says.

It did not "just happen".

you chose to pursue a relationship with another woman.

How about owning responsability for your own choices?

I suspect there are a few more things in that category. But I think it would be helpful for your own growth, if you started with that one.


Quote:
I want to be with my W and would leave OW in 1 sec if I thought things would change in my M.


they dont have a chance to, until you leave OW.

I'm sorry to hear about the mess of your first marriage. and the prior wife's affair in your current one.



Quote:
If she does change to start helping me some how long will it last?


as your wife... dont you at least owe her the chance for her to try?

My current status: june 2006. Wife ran out and filed D.
Finalized Jan 11, 2010, after 12.5 years M.
3 wonderful sons caught in the middle