can someone tell me how to quote others? great stuff being said.


mrscac - I have not heard of the enneagram. I'll check that out.

Dom - I love the puppy comment. If i think of it that way, perhaps I can be more patient. \:\) And you are also right, I need to think about what he is willing to do and not the fact that I have to tell him.

I did ask why he hasn't initiated yet and he was too tired to talk about it. He was extra cuddly though, so maybe he was glad I brought it up. I decided not to bring up the taking turns for intimacy idea yet. We have grueling schedules during the week, so it's tough to have energy to talk much less do anything else.

I do think we have a grueling road ahead. It is very hard to be polarized and maintain any kind of closeness. I'm sure a 5 year history isn't a lot by some people's standards, but for both of us it is. I am hoping we can build on the strengths of our relationship. We are good partners in many, many ways.

I think his criticisms and verbal abuse drove me to the LD side. I do think I'm low on testosterone but I've been trying to build it up naturally with diet and excercise since the steroids have a bad affect on me. He could definitely be more patient and compassionate, but he was a spoiled only child that was a bachelor for a longgggg time. I think in many ways that having a child hampered him more, but now that she's older he's really developed a great relationship with her. I'm hoping that helps too.

I also have a strong personality such that when he becomes abusive I often goad him. However, just as many times I shut down and withdraw. We are working through these issues though and he is going to the anger management class. I am trying to deal with the stress in my life.

Sex just seems to be such a fragile thing for so many couples. I can see how great sex can make a relationship better in all respects. i think my H is a bit unrealistic in the quantity he is expecting. He seems to think it should happen as often as it did in the first few months of dating - despite all of our other stresses and obligations.

This is a great board. It helps so much to know others are struggling too. SOmetimes I feel so alone.