I just want to make it better. . .

[seekpeaceofmind]

The last 24 hours have been pretty down. Maybe today will be better. I don't have any hope that H will recommit. When the bad thoughts pop in, I am trying to say "resolve to be ok". I don't know what being ok will look like, but I can at least promise myself that I will take charge of my happiness. My big problem is giving up the dream of a life-long partnership - a real marriage. I really thought that I would have one marriage, period. Now, I have get used to the idea of not just the pain/rejection of D, but also living a completely different life than I had envision. I don't have a new vision to replace it.