Good to see some great signs. W is really making an effort with the book and the idea of an adventure. That is great.
Now for the loving 2x4:
1. Why are you resisting her way of working on this? She is working on things in her own way. It may not be the best way, or the way you would do it, but it is a way. She needs to go through this review. This is a good time for you to listen intently and see what you have done in the past that has hurt you. She is drawing you a map, write those things down. Her preception is her reality.
2. Dude you need to get to AA. Period. Find a temporary sponsor at the end of your first meeting. Make sure they will be there to get you to the next meeting. Each meeting is diffrent so don't judge by going to just one or two, give it a month and see what happens.
3. Alcohol is the problem in your M. You can keep blaming her for what she did, wait to work that out in C'ing. Don't throw it in her face. Alcohol has made you numb towards her and her feelings, she eventually felt alone enough to look elsewhere. I'm in the same sitch with the booze, and I'll tell you what I had to hear the other night after explaining my sitch to my sponsor. So what I read above is "Your a victim, your a victim, your a victim!" Sorry, but you have been victimizing them while you drank. I know this is tough to swallow and hear. But you can fix it and make it right. It may not be the right you have pictured in your mind now, but it will be making things right.
Your so close man, and that is awesome. I wouldn't direct you to AA if I didn't think it would make a huge change in your life. It's a disease for many, get the "Big Book" and start reading. You haven't lost it all yet, and you don't have to.
