However I happen to be a woman that may say I want to do something, really do want to do it (if I don't want to do something, I have no trouble saying no) but don't immediately do it IF I'm feeling overwhelmed, tired, afraid, unsure, etc. By no means is this an excuse. It simply is what it is with me. (Feel sorry for Raven!!)
I tend to be this way too. Sometimes it's more a matter of "I want to intellectually, but other pressures and fears are also making me NOT want to emotionally." That's a fight that can go several rounds before it resolves one way or the other. That said, it's a fight that should resolve inside her, and I don't think "rescuing" her, *especially* prematurely, is going to be much help.
If she can email the counselor, the whole "phone call" thing is a red herring, unless she also has a passionate discomfort with email.....
And let me say I applauded your thoughts on "unsolicited rescuing as paternalism".
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
