Help me find the passion

[Dom R]

Ah - but he hasn't initiated in years! I swear, a couple of rejections and he ran away with his tail between his legs.

ah.. it wasnt clear to me that it had gotten that bad for him.
i'm sorry. then you have a tougher road ahead, if your goal is "for him to initiate".

I've tried the Nike solution. It didn't work for us. He knew that I wasn't getting much pleasure.

it's tough when both sides are "blocking" positive sex

Not too long ago, I suggested once a week. We missed one week and bam...silent treatment for a week.

yup. as I said... regular sex == positive bond, for men.
non-regular sex == "you dont love me"

The nail in the foot makes sense to me. Specific instructions make sense to me - but do I have to give the instruction repeatedly? Shouldn't a guy remember at some point??

yeah.... however, the thing is, you dont get to pick the point. you basically have to repeat it, "until he gets the point".
Unfortunately, that may be a very long time. or never.




maybe you could try not to focus on the "i have to tell him", and more on the "look at how willing he is to do what I ask him, once I actually ask him!"

I wrote to another poster, the analogy of "traning a puppy", with respect to getting the behavior you would like out of your husband. maybe that will give you a more amusing perspective


(that being said... there are other ways to deal with "forgetting". maybe you could work with him, and ask HIM... "honey.. what could you do, to help yourself not forget this stuff?"

ie: a weekly note on some electronic calender or something.