As ever, spot on. I have never got that far in any convo, but if I did, he would be the first person I would turn to.
SueS, hang in there and be strong for you and your d. It sounds like he is a serial drunk, with the periods of shame in between. Let him know that you will not stand for it any more, even up to the point of calling the police the next time he drink/drives (out of love and a fear he might ruin someone elses lives).
