I have heard that same line...if you would have moved out a long time ago and given me space, perhaps this would all be solved by now. You just wont give me what I have have wanted all along..your constantly monitoring me, looking over my shoulder, etc"..
I havent been monitoring her at all recently...she's pretty forthcoming with info if I dont ask.
I have read through that 'Healing Separation' a few times. W admitted the other day that we have been totally emotionally separated from each other. Her wall has been pretty thick. She has admitted that she really cares for me, is upset that she's hurting me, and that we are very good friends. Put two and two together there and you can see she just wont let herself accept it yet what she feels for me. She wants to shut off those feelings to see if she can experiment with them elsewhere.
I have thought much about her 'saving face' with all her friends, my friends, and our families. I think it could be tough for her to do this. But, I have told her that time heals everything, everyone is rooting for us, and that she would be perceived as a much stronger woman for fighting for her marriage than running from it. Regardless of what our friends opinions are, I think saving face is easy because they are rooting for us and they will accept her back in a heartbeat. They all think she is in 'alien' mode too. Perhaps we (family, friends, me) are all having our picnic and she's sort of peering out the window. But in that room of her are all her alternative friends. She may need each of them to drown in the moat so she can come back to reality.
I'm sticking to my premise that I hang in the house. She is WAW and she should take the responsibility and make the sacrifice to leave. Thats my position....
