As far as she is concerned, the real problem with our marriage is the fact that I not only have this disgusting desire for sexual contact with my spouse, but am rude enough to make it an issue.
Amen, brother.
Of course, the kernel of truth in that statement is this: your desire to have sex with someone who does not want to have sex with you, well, yes, that is pretty disgusting. It says more about you than it says about her, though.
SolidMechanic's point about the morality of leaving one's children worse off financially is, right now, my biggest internal battle. Because of my acceptance of the above point (why have sex with someone who doesn't want to have sex with me?), I have left the battlefield of "trying to convince her to have sex with me" behind. She won that battle, but stands proudly by her flag in the middle of a country in which I no longer care to live and about which, I no longer care.
