respond or stay still?

[heartbreak2]

I need something positive to happen today. So far it is all so negative and I am trying not to let it get me down and destroy my day.

the fact that OW is most likely with him did throw me into a tailspin. I never thought he would stoop that low.
then my mom ... Oh gosh.. when they made mothers she got in the wrong line. There is no compassion in her.. she needed a recipe today... Sure.. and of course she has to ask.. did H call? I said no and if he does I don't have anything to say to him he can leave a msg. She got mad... so well what else is new.

she had the nerve the other night to tell me that if I had just told him I was sorry he would have come back.??? this woman is insane and blaming me? oh life is not fair at times.

so I did see that SIL was on Aim today so I sent her a brief note told her I was thinking of her and keeping her in my prayer. A little while later she responded with... just... thank you
nothing else.

I felt like what have I got to lose...

just like with not talking to him now I have nothing to lose.
He shut me out and did not include me in a major event so I don't have time for him or any news about the kids and he is not going to know a thing going on here.

time to play hardball again. I got too soft again and kept him in the loop with the kids stupid me... I need to stop doing that.

Can I go no contact with out telling him... just like he does to me?

He went to Europe for 10 days in Oct. and no one knew he was gone. he told s he was taking time off needed to relax and have fun. It was a wk or so later that he gave s a bag with toiletries when he was leaving on a trip. i looked inside and there was soap and razor and shampoo.... from a hotel in Rome.
they had lost his luggage and gave him this bag of stuff.

I was fit to be tied. For this was during his wks of no communication period.

so.. do I talk to him or do I ignore him if he calls?
this is what I am asking myself today.

I will not txt or email that is for sure.

Going to the garden center to look around and think about what I want to plant this yr. Time to redo the front shrubs they are old and nasty looking and I have tried to prune and shape but they just are not going to do it. Will move them to the back and put in new ones under the window. Time for change. Lots of change.
going to redo the screen porch as soon as the weather warms.

sorry I am so down but there is no one around this week to talk to. One of my good friends got remarried and well the honeymoon has not ended yet and it has been 3 months... life can be good again.