Hi COG, this is a great statement. I'd like to add some very minor upgrades that I think are more 'manly'. I don't mean any disrespect, I think you are right on the mark with this.
Originally Posted By: COG
"W, you may think I'm sabatoging your attempt to leave, but I will not do that. You are free to go. I [wish you would stay with me, while I work on being the man I need to be] -> (would prefer we work together on relationship. I understand your feelings and I agree with you that it won't work, so I'm letting you go and I'll help you find a place to live.) [I'm going to miss you.] <<<-- (don't say this, she needs to wonder if you will or not). Add --> (Just like you) I [need to keep on living too, and] am moving forward with my life without you. I realize the finances are tight, and I'm being careful about what I buy and I trust you'll be the same.
The only thing I am adding in these changes is this: You come across as a man who is DONE also. You state that you PREFER that it work, however you UNDERSTAND that SHE doesn't feel the same way. By doing so you remove all her arguments that you are 'blocking her escape'.
In my case 2 years ago I told my wife very emphatically that "I have no illusions about your desire to be divorced and 'free'. When are you moving out?"
Then, a few months later after no action, I told her "So I think you said you were moving out this summer (in a couple months). Have you found a place yet?"
Yes, it scared her to death because she believed she was losing me for good. In that situation, it turned the tides eventually.
