When you're actually WITH them, however... doesnt it make sense to make the most of that opportunity? To show you how nice you can be? Going off and dating other people, would seem to be the opposite. It would seem to be, to be throwing away the opportunity you have right now.
My current living arrangement is temporary - It is almost at it's end. I'm planning on making the most of the time we are spending together, but as lots of other people have suggested, I need to back off from W more than I have in the past once we are separated again - After we separated the first time, we really spent a lot of time together (some of which was positive, some not so much). Quite a number of people have suggested that I back off from W and let her really be on her own for a while and if she needs me, she knows where to find me.
Originally Posted By: Dom R
You have the chance to really shine to her right now... to show her you are enjoyable to be with, even though this OM is a schmuck.
And that is what I have been doing for the last couple of weeks we have been living together - I'm not really sure how much actually gets through. She occasionally seems happy to have me around; at other times, she'll just be miserable. I have no idea how much, or even if, her current state of mind has to do with having me around so much.
Originally Posted By: Dom R
If you really know that deep down, your wife is one of those shallow "i want to pursue what I cant have" people, then sure, go the hard-to-get route. Seems to me, though, that you'd be better off following up (lightly) on any little openings she leaves you.
My W pretty much has a one track mind - She'll get stuck on an idea, and go with it for a while. Any rational person would have given up on OM a long time ago, considering there isn't any 'relationship'. I'm certainly not trying to manipulate her or play games - I just need to change a lot of the things I'm doing since they don't seem to be getting either of us anywhere.
