Confusion of a WAW (Thread 6)

[Dom R]

It's gotten to the point where W is just totally unaware of what she is doing. Maybe if I back off, or even start meeting new people, she'll wake up. Right now, if she follows this path, she's going to end up with no one.

Brit... seems like you are planning to do the wrong thing at the wrong time.
I completely understand the lack of motivation, given what you are seeing about what she is doing... but if you actually want to SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE... I think you'd be better off making decisions with your head, not your feelings right now?

One of the toughest things about being separated after a huge marriage "bomb", is the lack of opportunity to show your spouse directly, any changes that you may have made to your lifestyle, or general habits.
That's when the biggest effect on the spouse is the "oh by the way i'm dating someone else" tactic. 'cause there isnt much else to actually do, sometimes.

When you're actually WITH them, however... doesnt it make sense to make the most of that opportunity? To show you how nice you can be?
Going off and dating other people, would seem to be the opposite. It would seem to be, to be throwing away the opportunity you have right now.

You have the chance to really shine to her right now... to show her you are enjoyable to be with, even though this OM is a schmuck.

If you really know that deep down, your wife is one of those shallow "i want to pursue what I cant have" people, then sure, go the hard-to-get route. Seems to me, though, that you'd be better off following up (lightly) on any little openings she leaves you.