Rob is spot on. I have to agree that calmer, cooler heads are needed after such an awful evening. Your H is still 100% textbook MLC/WAS. If H wants to separate, let him move out.
I think you have to consider yourself very fortunate to have someone like Rob in your corner, because he has taken such an interest in your sitch to help you with such sage advice. (Bravo, Rob. I learn quite a lot from what you say to Sue and others.)
Refocus your energies back on D3 and on yourself. Let your H do what he's going to do (since no one can stop him anyway), but stand your ground. Think in terms of assertiveness, not anger. This is the path that the apostle Paul suggested in his letters. He encouraged us to speak out for what we believe and not let others trample on our words, hearts and convictions.
