DBing isn't for those seeking instant gratification. This isn't the Dr Phil show, where our problems are solved in an hour. Many of us wish it could be that way, but it just isn't going to happen that way.
Slow down. Take a deep breath. Remember that the marital problems leading up to your Sep didn't happen overnight, and it cannot be "cured" overnight. What are you doing for you? What are you doing to improve the quality of your life? You are going to wake up every day. It is up to you to decide how you are going to live each day. In my sitch, my H chose the bitterness and anger, and according to those who see him and work with him, he is a pretty miserable human being. Lonely, angry, resentful, adrift and unable to enjoy life at any meaningful level. It must suck to be in his shoes. I miss my H so much, I am truly sorry for the events leading to our separation, and I still love him. But his road is not my road. I don't want that anger, that stress, that misery. Whether he is in my life or not, I do have to wake up each day and spend the entire day with me.
I have learned that DBing is not easy. And sometimes it IS lonely. I am glad that I GAL. It has made the wait much easier, although I will admit that sometimes I get tired. I want the nightmare to end. But I realize that I don't get to make that choice.
