It is not about you hon, it is the depression, his inner demons not making him able to see the good things he has. During this past year I have tried to be the best loving, sweet understanding W of them all. We went on vacations, go out w/out kids, go somewhere real nice during special occasions, buy expesive stuff that H wants, etc etc. During C last week my H told the C how only his job kept him together, that outside of his job he felt he had no life. Nothing you could do is going to fill that void, the void is not in his family, the void is within him.
Don't take everything he says as gospel, these are ravings of a sick confused mind. It is about his inability to give of himself and put others ahead of him, his selfishness. I know it is not easy to take it personally, I myself have let my H's aloofness get to me, I felt selfconcious about my body (by the way, I'm in shape and look nice), felt I wasnt' pretty enough, didnt' have such and such as other women, constantly hoping my H would make me feel better about myself.
So, dont' let his lunatic remarks make you forget how beutiful and valuable you are.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
