W less angry with me, but not ready for piecing

[Heimlich]

Lanzo,

I don't think you should link the two things: you forgiving her and her recommitting. Holding on to the anger hurts no one but yourself and the possibility of saving your marriage. I know from my experience that I said that I had forgiven and wasn't blaming my W while we were actively trying to reconcile from Oct of 06 to April of last year. I sortof had, but not really and had an undercurrent of blame towards her for all that had happened. Among other issues, that was something that pushed her to the whole ILYBNILWY thing last April.

Let it go. Forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting, but it does mean letting go of the anger, acknowledging that your W made a mistake (I found owning my role in the failure of the M allowed me to really forgive my W for everything), and stopping the blame.

Just my 1 penny thought for the day.

BD