Obviously he does not know you love languages, how to you intend to let him know.
I've let him know...many many many times...it makes sense to him sometimes and other times it just doesn't...he did say he'd look at ssm..but has yet to..and then the other night on our way home from our c session he said do you really think that if we had sex more often it would solve all our problems..my response was that things would be better...that is not our only problem but one of them...and again I was met with the..."that's just the way I am" stance.
I am expected to just accept that h's drive is in waves...it fluctuates...sometimes every day for a week..then nothing for a month or more...really why should I be expected to accept that just because that just the way he is...what about me?? that isn't the way I am why should he have to accept that that's not the way I am...I had to accept during each pregnancy that though I wanted to be physical becuase it wasn't something h was comfortable with or he though taboo I was left to go without til many months after the birth.
the other of my languages is quality time...I have to accept that to h..quality time is sitting on the couch and watching fox news and falling asleep after the kids go to bed. because again "that's just the way I am" so that is not the way I am though I have learned to appreciate the time...why should h not accept that "that's just the way I am" and be willing to go out or even stay home but do more "stuff" together...even if just to play a game of cards or darts or sit and talk.
I am expected to just accept the "that's just the way i am" attitude and be happy...gee if the way I am means I would like to hang out with someone and talk...occasionally have sex..laugh and have fun...that being the way I am should I just go do that??? just go find someone else to do those things with...go find someone else who I can share my side of the "that's just the way I am" no, no, no...that just tells h he just isn't good enough...no matter what he does it just isn't good enough...gee maybe that's because you aren't listening...you are too busy doing other things to do the simple things your w is asking for...ask her to go out...hell at this point she doesn't even care if it's you wanting to go to a sporting event and taking her along..I'd even be happy to go run an errand to home depot with you...the important part of it all is you ask me to leave the house before the kids go to bed and we do somethign together!!! oh yeah and have sex with your wife or hell even just flirt with her.
