Another locked thread....I guess that means this thing is dragging on..... It looks like it is almost unanimous that I should stay. Unfortunately, the guy that has the final say is me. I understand the opinions that each of you have expressed. If someone wants to screw around, I could argue that the fact that there is a spouse at home makes it easier when kids are involved. I am still leaning towards leaving because I think it is the only shopt I have left.
Last night we talked for a couple of hours....she really has a high opinion of herself...which is not a bad thing per se but she has nothing to prove to me anyway. She has an air of arrogance about her. Pretty weird becasue she is not exactly cultured or wordly and it shows sometimes. Bu that is neither here or there. Again a pretty good evening without the good night kiss and hug etc. That is the last thing on my mind right now. I was supposed to get us an appointment to see a lawyer for a preliminary meeting. She asked me if I called with a smile on her face. I told her I did but did not get a response......she was not sure I was telling the truth.....weird. The house if full this AM. Both stepdaughters are here....D7 is at school. the oldest already has shared something with me that i am not comfortable with regarding her recent breakup with her boyfriend and sleeping wth her old boyfriend...there goes that apple again.....i need to make sure that i break the "spell" with D7 and instill in her some decent values.
Spent a good chunk of the day speaking with oldest stepdaughter who has her own issues. I was surprised however how much she has grown and seems to have her stuff together. She went out of her way to point out to me on several occasions that she is not like her mother. anther funny thing is she wanted to know if my parents of all people are mad at her and her sister. I assured them that they are not even mad at their mother (disappointed) why in the world would they be mad at you?
John, the only good thing I heard from my W last night was that she always wanted me to be able to hug my kids before they went to bed at night. I can't imagine a life without being able to do that. I know you are a good Dad. That all the extra time you can with your D7
Thanks for the good dad compliment Woog. It kills me to think that the clock is ticking to the proposed announcement date. There are many things I will miss with D7 but i can not keep harping on the negative aspects of a seperation or divorce. I need to find some positives or I will not be able to get through this. The more I think about it, the only real negative of all this is D7 and her reaction or how she will be affected. The rest is all or will be only positives I am sure of that. Incidentally, I just thought about this, stepdaughter said that W was still unsure of what she was doing a few days ago. How do i go about stalling the announcement and possibly the seperation without looking like I am pursuing. I am starting to feel a little anxious about the announcement.......
woog, i remember when first wife wigged out , having to tell my two children ages 7+2 . very tough. be honest , they will be scared. remember they are young. help them understand as much as you can that mommy and daddy love them no matter what. do not try to forecast the future for them. keep them in the day to day , keep them busy. hug and love them. i have to admit i am getting emotional just thinking about you having to do this. brings back some real tough memories. i have faith in your ability as a great dad to get them through this. it will help that your wife is still in the same house. my kids have really not noticed since wife and i are in seperate bedrooms. i am so sorry you are having to do this.
m-54 w-44 children-4 bomb-sept 21 2007 t-21 m-20yrs bomb-sept 23 2007 divorced but not giving up hope, not yethttp://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...rue#post1224023
There has been no explaining so far .... let me explain. D7 then D6 used to love sleeping with mom so every once in a while we would let her sleep in our bed. Well, the once in a while became a regular thing. It is normal to her now. I remember a few months ago we tried to make her sleep in her own bed and her reaction was pretty agressive. Anyhow, the short answer is so far no explanations neccesary on my end. Sorry I can't be more helpful.
By the way, I think I will ask W to delay the announcement unless she is 100% sure that this is not fixable. I don't want to hurt D7 needlessly.
Sorry to hijack your thread. Last night my wife "moved" into the extra bedroom. Her thought was because of that we need to tell the kids about the D. I want to wait until we have our stuff nailed down on what's happening. Therfore, I think we need to wait and will have to come up with some reason why W is in the extra bedroom.
