Tell him. But don't make it into a bigger deal than it is. Tell him you've been taking this drug for [eta by fearless: 5 months since your surgery] and LIKE MOST PEOPLE WHO TAKE IT FOR ANY LENGTH OF TIME you feel that you are dependent on it (you can avoid the emotion-laden word ADDICTED at first). Don't go out of your way to pass your agitated state of mind to him. Tell him that stopping it has side effects and you want some help doing that. The best, safest way to do that is to check into an inpatient facility (you can also avoid the emotion-laden term REHAB at first). I'm not suggesting you avoid those terms altogether, but just don't call him and say, "I'm an addict and I'm going to rehab!" AT FIRST until he has a clear, level-headed picture of what the sitch is. There's a way of presenting a story and there's a way.
Lil,
Great Advice!! Dependent and inpatient facility are probably the most accurate words right now.
WHY do you think he will divorce you over this?
Red can give her answer to this but my guess is that a lot of it is the fear and tension from his previous bailing (EA/PA/talk of divorce) on her. Add to that that he was home a month ago and she may worry that he will feel she was dishonest with him and hiding things from him. Also his time at home was not exactly "perfect" for them and that might add her worries.
Red,
Besides agreeing with all the great advice on how to stop taking Hydrocodone, my advice is to relax about your H. Assume that he loves you and cares about you and that his greatest concern will be that you are okay and that the kids are okay. I would not try to wait until May at this point. I think that since he was home in December you would be better off letting him know sooner than later. This has all come up suddenly, yesterday right? So maybe letting him know that you need to check into an inpatient facility this weekend for some follow up issues from your surgery would be the place to start because it is the truth that the Hydrocodone was from the surgery, right? Then hopefully you can fill in more details next week with some concrete evidence that you are doing fine and with specific information on the issues you will need to deal with???
Just some thoughts. I know it's tricky but I think relationships recover more quickly from difficult things when they are exposed versus being covered up (no matter how well meaning the cover up is). At this point you haven't really kept anything from him that you were not keeping from yourself at Christmas.
GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!
But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads? ~Albert Camus
