How do you undo detachment?

[WAS32]

Okay, concidering that he is the one that wants to come back I think that H should break it off with OW asap. I am going through this whole Ow and piecing thing right now too. So I have done a lot more reading of the DR and it says NO CONTACT. If he wants this then he has to put some sort of effort into it. This doesn't mean then when he breaks it off with her that he is not going to mourn the loss of the A. He will. And give him that much. But he needs to end it now or he is just cake eating.

At some point he is going to have to acknowledge your feelings on all of this and make you feel more secure with what he wants. Ending it immediately wil be a good start. There has to be no contact and he needs to tell her that he is recommitting to his M. If he can't do that then he needs to stay away until he can.

And I really don't think you need to over think the ML part of all this. There is no right or wrong when it comes to ML to your H. If he feels used ten so be it. It was still a connection for him and he probably needed that. Go with what feels right. I hope all works out for you.