HELP!! my 25 y/o H walked out... maybe mlc? HELP!!

[cat03]

I have to ask you, cat. How do you keep that love inside yourself after 8 months?

Hon, here I am, with H still lying and seein ow (long story, was supposed to break up w/her but didnt) and still, I love him. Throughout the S my heart just never stopped, I didn't do anything to keep the love in there, it just lived on...

My other rule, which helped lots, was to watch whom I told about H and the S. My family didn't know, or WW3 would've erupted, I would've gotten the "leave that jerk!' like you. Family members care for you but give lousy advice, it is so easy to try to end your pain by telling you to forget him and move on. I only told my cousin who went through the same thing & understood why I was still fighting. So, careful what you say and who you say it to.

For the 8 months your H was away, did he go through mini-stages? When he spoke of coming home, was it unexpected or were there changes just prior to?

Yes, anger, aloofness, half friendly, neutral, by the 6mth we went out for V day, and was telling me he had "one foot in", then (me notknowing) ow broke it off (the bubble burst), and he was alone for amonth and then one day he just wanted back.

Should I go out with him? If only for the sake of getting out of the house and having a few (much needed) laughs?

be very, VERY careful, even if he knows you r separated and a mom wont' mean he won't put the moves on you, you are very vulnerable now, and maybe it is a good idea not to get close to him, he must know upfront that you are fighting for your M and not ready for any kind of R other than friends, if you suspect he wants more, you must break it off. Sure, your h is out there making an ass of himself, that doesnt' mean that u will too. You might end up in an emotional affair (i connected with this guy online "as friends", when he decided not to contact me anymore I was very sad and missed him way too much, and I never meet him!).

how much fun he had. i nonchalantly said, "Oh, that sounds like fun." and changed the subject. Why would I want to hear about how much fun he was having with OW?

he's just not being sensitive or he's pushing your buttons, you passed the test w/flying colors. Sometimes WAS try to do this, to push our buttons to "remind" themselves why they left and to condone their erroneous ways.
Stay strong and keep up the good work)))))))))))))