(Essie... sorry to hijack your thread...) thanks for bringing up saturn returns, I think it has a lot to do with the QLC or the Transitional Life Crisis and I have been thinking about it a lot too!
One rule of thumb, straight from Divorce Remedy, is to use a strategy for 2 weeks and then try something else, unless you get a negative reaction from your S that you shouldn't be using that strategy at all. I know what you mean about being patient with the NC, and NC seems to have its own time frame. I myself am 2 1/2 months into NC, and ready to go to 4-6. But every situation is different. There's no way for us to "know" if it's "working" when we're not getting any feedback, but it does give us space to recenter, get a life, and work on our PMA, and take a step back from the rollercoaster...
