Have you been to Al-Anon? My sil is trying to encourage me to go. (She and my brother are also sober alcoholics too.) My H is a sober alcoholic, but even though he is sober he has had a long string of addictions ever since he was sober and his affair now seems like an addiction to me. He has to either be with her, calling her, or texting her constantly. I was thinking about going to try it out just one time. I don't know if it would be helpful though with a spouse addicted to an OW!!!Karen43