Hi Lizzy, thanks for taking the time to read my story and giving me your input.
Believe me it wasn't difficult to make my change obvious to him, I was really loosing it. I mean really. I had been trying for 6-7 months to accommodate his needs and wishes, that when he finaly decided to leave I felt so much anger I couldn't handle it at all.
My family and friends were so afraid of what would happen to me if I kept on like that, that all tried to tell me it was over, that I should just move on. And I did try for the first weeks, with a therapist and all (my kids also because my son was reacting really bad) but every night I felt I was fighting myself and it didn't feel right.
My H is a nice man, it felt as if I was giving up on him too soon. So, when he started noticing, I told him once on the phone "I am feeling better, I stopped fighting myself and our bond. No matter what you do, you will soon realise that you belong with us, in this house which we make a home for our family. We can't throw everything away. I'll wait, I need time to find myself also and when you feel ready, we'll be here". His reaction was almost immediate. And this is where I stand now.
Since Friday I've been reading the Divorce Remedy again & again and I am trying to figure out what to do. No, I can't say our R is much better, but I do see him wanting to be around more, even the phonecalls are lasting longer and all the things he tells our friends that have been asking him why he looks calmer, he knows will get to me. His answer is that "Kalni is calmer, I am happy we have this communication now..., she reminds me of the girl I used to know..., Love definitely exists between us...". We haven't discussed anything about our future yet. So I haven't brought up MC. I do not know if he would be positive.
Do I have to do something now? I guess I am worried that we'll become too civilised and relax in this limbo state for too long. The fact that he is difficult in making decisions is against us. But I definitely do not want to push him.
