Ongoing affair, D papers filed, advice wanted

[SirPrizeMe]

Wow. That's a tough thing for me. I'm gonna have to think about that some more. Meditate on it.

I truly don't wish ill for my wife. I wish her the best. And, I don't wish bad things even for the man. Remember he was my friend, for a long time. To do the things they did, the way they did them? it shows that they were acting out of pain and hurt. I don't wish that for them.

But right now I cannot separate the divorce from the destruction of my family. I want her to be happy. Unquestionably. But this way? No one deserves heartache, for sure, but there are 4 children involved here. Seven if you count his kids! Can someone please stand up and act like a parent here? No one deserves heartache, I agree. But how broken-hearted are my kids going to be? Can someone please stand up and volunteer for adult duty?

People say "the kids will be FINE." Bullspit.

Divorce is not good for kids, period. They may be, I repeat may be FINE in spite of the divorce, not because of it. If your kid breaks his arm, he MAY be fine, or he may not. If it's a clean break, chances are he will heal well. If it is not clean, he may never regain full use of his arm. Now, if your spouse wants to break your kid's arm, do you "wish her the best"? "I support you in your decision to break junior's arm"??!?!?

If there were no kids involved, I would easily be able to say "best of luck!" Sure, I'd be hurt, but I would move on.

But there are children here.

I can see your point, though. I'm not there yet, but I can see it from here. Let me think about it some more.