Snodderly and Hope - I still struggle at times with trying to understand Depression. There is an excellent book by Dorothy Rowe about depression. She is a fully trained psychotherapist who has struggled with depression herself. People with depression who have read it say it is one of the most helpful books they have come across in explaining what depression is like and what can be done about it by the sufferer. She is generally opposed to drug therapy except in extreme cases, and to get people over a difficult period, and totally against long term reliance on anti-depressants.
Snodderly, thank you also for explaining this complusion to stay in touch. With my h it is one of us - he needs to have contact at least once a month with one of his sons or me. If he has contact with them he can skip having contact with me . . . at least for a while. If he has no contact he gets desperate. He dosn't understand why - if I question him about what he wants, very gently, he says 'Well it is what people do' as if he has a manual of how to be human in his hand.
He cannot understand why we can't all be 'friends' which appears to mean that he can do as he wishes, disappear for long periods of time, see us if and when he chooses, and be as rude, vitriolic and critical of us as he wishes. Presumably while we all smile and nod! It is an unusual definition of friendship and family!!
