Yeah, I go between the crying, shattered part of grief and the pi$$ed off, "where do you get off" phase of grief. I know these aren't the actual stages, but they are my stages!
Anyway, it would be so much easier if I just didn't have to talk to him for awhile. But he gets back tomorrow and then moves out Monday--I think, but you are right as it is all about him right now and he hasn't officially given me his move-out date, not that I am his landlord--anyway we HAVE to talk soon bc we have to tell our son and have to work out his visiting. We agreed to do a calendar for S and I WILL NOT accept it if he tries to just make some verbal arrangement or some "I'll come a couple days a week" vague statement. I am the mother of his children but not a hired babysitter. He will have the kids often bc I need to GAL, too. Not just him livin' it up bachelor-style at the apartment, going out for beers with the guys 3 or 4 nights a week. He actually has a co-worker who is "Dating" (and sleeping with, and living with some of the time) his ex-wife. I already told H not to get any ideas. He will not divorce me and then just come play with me when he wants some fun. As far as the fighting over stupid things goes, he did that all the time when the OW was in the picture. Right before he would leave the house for work in the morning if he was going out that night, or sometimes even he would call from work in the afternoon. Then find some way to start a fight. So he could hang up mad at me and have a "reason" to do what he was going to do anyway.... Anyway once he moves out if he tries to pick a fight with me, I think I will just tell him to call back when we can have a civil discussion, and leave it at that. I don't want to go off on him bc me being a bee-otch will not help with any kind of R plans. But I won't be walked on either bc that just helps him tell himself he is happier without me. Does this sound like the right approach? Not to drive him away, but not to tolerate his crap or get sucked in? Thanks for the support. I don't know which will be harder, if he calls me picking fights or doesn't call me at all.......
