I feel your pain, craig. Don't be so hard on yourself, though. You are no different then the rest of us by feeling weak and helpless.
Let me ask you this - what has your W been saying the last 4 months, specifically, about why she can't be married to you? Is there any validity to anything she says on this matter?
List the reasons here. Let's look at them and pray on them. Let's discern if any of it is true or if there is some underlying message, perhaps from God.
Argue her position with me. Put yourself in her shoes.
Me - 43 and She -36. No kids. Married 7 yrs - Together 14 yrs