You are letting her set the dynamic. She is acting and you are reacting. You have given up already, even though you are still not thinking straight.
Break that cycle. Yes, heal yourself but don't slam the door shut until you are sure.
And even if you THINK you are through then think again.
Remember when I thought I was finished - go back and read what you posted to me to show that I was wrong. That advice built a better Jeff.
It is not over until the fat lady sings. Until then, DB principles apply. For YOU, not just the R.
Ok, I'm not thinking clearly right now. "Don't DB", "No, DO DB", "let her go, fix yourself", "No, work on the marriage".
HELP!
GIve me a link to the comments you said I gave you. Please clarify, give more details and examples in your comments.
Quote:
This seems like 'R-Talk' which is counter to DB'ing. I'm not sure if it is a good or bad idea. Suggesting it may push her away.
I guess I can write her an e-mail with this idea. That way she doesn't have to 'debate' it with me. She can read it and choose her path. Comments?
Read this again. All about her and her reaction.
What do you want to do? [/quote]
E_mail her the link with a message saying that this might be a good thing for us. It scares me to think about it since she will likely say 'no, it's too late'. But it's a risk I guess.
I'm still not strong yet. Maybe I need to not do things like this until I have some strength.
