Thanks, Hope2, MotherMagee, and Lizzy! Here I was feeling bad for myself bc lately it seems I am the only one reading my posts. Then I get three responses--you made my day! Sounds like we are all in pretty similar boats these days. Lizzy, I will have to check out your thread, I have read the others. I agree it is so frustrating to be the "agreeable wife". I DO want to voice my opinion, I miss the outgoing me that I used to be, that my H fell in love with 16 years ago. I can't really pinpoint when I started censoring myself. I know 8 yrs ago we were house-hunting after another of H's job transfers. He liked a house I didn't really like. I knew we would be there only a year or so, so I said I liked it, too. A couple weeks later we found out he was getting transferred again (after 4 months in a hotel) so we never got the house. I confessed that I didn't like the place. He still talks about that, in fact that was the example he gave the MC. But he had it mixed up and said I moved into a house that I didn't like. (We moved 8 times in 8 years so I can see the confusion!) So I guess all I can do is start to be honest with my opinions again. Sometimes it is as trivial as what toppings I want on my pizza or what movie to rent, sometimes it is as important as me going back to work or how we raise our kids. I know it wasn't working for me to silence myself, so I guess I have nothing to lose by having a voice again. The worst that could happen, he leaves for good, but he is already moving out in 2 days so why not take that risk? I know if I keep living on these eggshells I will never be happy with my life, even if I know I want to spend it with H and the kids together. Besides his negative reaction last night is probably bc he hasn't seen me voice my own opinion in so long, I bet it was a shock. He'll get used to it, or he won't. All I can be is me. Keep the faith you guys, I will try to do the same!
