Do you have faith in anything other than Frank? I do realize you've got one eye trained on us to see if we come up with anything good but really, are you faithless?
The stuff your wife is dabbling in has undercurrents you wouldn't believe.
What if the only hope you had was in prayer?
Would you humble yourself?
Could you?
Just a thought...
No, I have never really had faith in anything other than Frank.
When I lost faith in Frank, I lost everything.
Sven suggested I embrace her need to divorce and allow myself to believe that in the end I'm better without her because she hasn't been the woman I need for the past several years. I've been a broken man who needed a woman who could help me fix myself.
Now, I have myself to fix on my own, and I don't have the burden of fixing her any more. It hurts but like Becca also said "You're still DB'ing. Stop it".
Originally Posted By: becca
stop doing that let it go let her do what she needs to do the sooner you can do that, the sooner you can be on the right track, to either making your marriage work, or moving on
you've spent too much time dbing, and you did a damn good job of it but right now, saving YOU is more important than saving your marriage
she's off her freakin rocker
(frank: how can you say that? She's been in a 'bad' relationship and just has had enough) Becca: bullsh@!t when are you goign to put some responsibility on her? that is you still taking all the blame she hasn't been in a BAD relationship she's failed to love the man who loved her a whole lot and who provided for her and who gave up himself, his whole sense of identity, for HER she doesn't know what a BAD relationship is
no, you aren't perfect you have issues too but she has not yet taken responsibility for herself it is all about how YOU failed bullsh!t you didn't force her to have multiple affairs that is an ethical issue that she needs to own up to like you said, she sure as hell has the strength to be supportive to other guys but she can't support YOU? no, that is HER flaw, not yours give her half the blame at least
had been married to him for as long as you have been married. Because I said for better, for worse, in sickness and in health, and in EVERY relationship, there is a time where one partner has to carry a little more weight, then that one will have a down moment and the other takes over some of the load
it is never 50/50 what she should have done was sit down with you and say "frank, what can we do? What can I do? How can we get help?"
but she wasn't 'strong enough' right no....she just didn't have the nerve to take that kind of responsibility on because you are the protector, the caretaker the provider she wants to rag at you for not taking care of YOURSELF....but look at her? she fails over and over again in being supportive, but she doesn't have to fix that? she can just move on? she doesn't see it as being a problem, apparently easier to move on than to put for the effort you deserve so much more like i said the other day, SHE should be trying to win YOU back
frank_D: even though she has been really hurt by my faulires, and my behaviors? you've been hurt by HER failures and behaviors the difference is, you carried her when she failed she just let you fall not only that She ultimately abandoned you in your time of need.....and then has the nerve to use the excuse that she couldn't help? And she just gives up and moves on, and all that is STILL your fault? Not her own? she needs to take responsibility too
A lot to think about. I guess I feel like I should have been 'better' at protecting her. But then maybe in the beginning I ws too good at it and this is the result?
