Real Growing and Healing 2

[saffie]

Thanks for your post Frank.

I haven't had a chance to read the links you sent me yet as I have been in bed with a migraine but I will 'read up' tomorrow.( I just got up to take some more painkillers and wanted to check in and see how you were - I'm back to bed now). I realise I am a newbie compared to many on here and maybe not the most strict DBuster, however I came to these boards post recommitment with other issues, so my situation had been going on for longer than it may appear and I fought some pretty big demons within myself to get my M back on track. The difference between you and me is I worked, (and still do every day), on fixing myself. My H has had to decide for himself if I was worth staying with. Happily for me he decided I was. I was fortunate that I did not know I was competing with another lover for my S whilst working on myself and that was a great advantage. The pressure would have been unbearable if I had known I was 'competing' and would have put another slant on it all.

I find your posts confusing Frank. You don't seem to be completelly clear on the outcome you expect to achieve or you hope for. I think Theo's comment hit the nail on the head regarding the lesson teaching.

If I was your W frankly I would find you scary and want to run away. I would be completely unsure how to offer you support. But then, I only see what you post and not the complete picture.

I am sorry you are hurting so much.