ann25, just a thought. Maybe the reason he treats you badly is because he knows he can and you put up with it.
sheeesh. such pessimism from posters on ann's thread.
She's already pointed out a huge proof that the opposite is true; that he just doesnt realize what he's doing. When she confronted him about the way he was touching her... he finally understood.
I agree and disagree... I think in regards to everything other than sex/affection in our R, this is true. He knows that if something doesn't get done, i'll just do it. No amount of asking him, "please load the dishwasher today" helps. He knows that i don't want to fight, so i won't. He knows that things will still get done and that we'll move on. i let him get away with those things because i don't much have a choice, i can't exactly go on strike with D3 and D1 hanging out.
OTOH, physically/sexually if i tell him specifically that i don't appreciate something, sometimes he gets it sometimes he doesn't. When we talked the other night, i had to get to the point of telling him that i felt used by him and like he didn't even love me when he did that to make him really understand... I feel like i almost have to hurt him to make him understand what i need. I think that is why i have a hard time with it, cause i've done enough hurting already. But he normally does change his ways, at least temproarily...
I know that i have to be extremely specific with him. I think showing him exactly how it feels when he grabs on me (i did it while he was trying to do something) helped alot!
If i can't fall in love... I'd like to fall in chocolate! ~ Author Unknown
