Brita, it sounds to me like H does want to have some contact with you. Also, it sounds like he is not able to 'look after you' as he likely has in the past. There is a depression that goes with MLC, think of him as disabled and likely to be that way for awhile. I also am dealing with an MLC H who sounds a lot like yours. I did impose some structure on the situation -- it was stringing me out too much mooning over the email in-box and constantly checking for telephone messages. I was reduced to acting like a lovesick teenager and after awhile I couldn't stomach the indignity of that. I negotiated with H for regular reliable contact instead of leaving it up to his emotional state du jour. Our first agreement was for two phone calls a week on Mondays and Wednesdays at 5:30pm, and a date day or evening on Fridays. After several weeks H increased the contact to 2 dates per week and we have maintained that increase.
It's very good advice to not engage in any OR talks. Keep it light.
