Prior to that our R talk was about how he couldn't commit to me and may never be able to commit to me. And now, 2 months later he's incredulous about me wondering aloud if we will still be together in 5 years???
It does look like maybe your H could be coming around. Maybe the less pressure you put on him to commit to you, the more comfortable he feels around you, and the more he may feel willing to commit. Moving & buying a new house is a HUGE committment. My H has talked about it a bit too, but I'm not jumping to any conclusions right now. You are right, your H's actions are speaking volumes. Keep it up and I really hope you get that "fresh start".
I too have done a 180 and am not initiating R talks anymore, and boy is that difficult. I have always been the one to do a R check (even before the A), which nearly always ended up leaving me feeling worse, sometimes leading to fights, always leading to me crying. I do like your "roommate" analogy. I don't live w/ my H, so I have think of our R in terms of "dating" (a bit more than "friendship" b/c we do have sex once in awhile and we do say ILY). Funny how we try to find a word to define what our R is about at any one point in time - at least for me it helps to put things into perspective.
And w/ my H out of work, not talking about that is a challenge for me too. I've always been a worrier, especially about $$. I can appreciate your curiosity about what's going on at your H's work, but keep biting your tongue. I think pressure makes our Ss clam up, so maybe you not talking about him not going to work has made it easier for him to face whatever it is that he was avoiding, and maybe one day he'll talk to you about it.
It's too bad about your Mom's friend, it is really sad. The statistics say that 40+% of women and 60+% have an A, so it's out there, just hidden.
Have a great day. FA
What does not destroy me, makes me stronger.
FA:43, H:42 D:7 M:10 yrs, T:24 yrs EA:?, PA:1/06 S:3/07 EA/PA ongoing Aborted attempt to move home 07/08
