H has been home & has now gone back (left on Saturday). For those of you who don't know my sitch, H is deployed for a year. I know the next 3 1/2 mnths will fly by, but that's hard to see right now. It seems harder this time around than when he left the first time. S3 is having a really hard time also.
When he left last May, things had only been "ok" w/ us for about a month so I still felt as if I was walking on eggshells. Now that he has been gone for so long and was home for a month, things are definitely a lot better. We had our moments and I had my moments when thoughts would be triggered, but for the most part everything is absolutely wonderful again. I know he is definitely recommitted completely.
I think the hardest part, but what is actually reality, is how much work an M actually takes. I guess we all ended up in our situations b/c we didn't realize that and we're all lucky here in piecing that we have a 2nd shot at it. I tend to believe that one person ends up getting a lot of the "load," but I can also see that H seems to be putting forth the effort in his own ways.
My biggest problem seems to be that when things seem to be kind of "normal," I'm always afraid that H is going to get bored or decide that our life isn't what he wants again. I just have made sure that I keep us away from getting back into a rut and, even when things are "normal," that I am sure I am keeping the attention on our M that needs to be there day to day. I know that w/ the stress of work, the boys, just life in general, our M tended to get put on the back burner and I am just making sure that that doesn't happen again.
I know it will get easier each day having him gone again and, before we know it, he'll be back for good. I'm just having a hard time staying positive right now, but I know I'll perk back up here soon.
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
