Well, it has been a few days since I have posted, just wanted to stop in and let you all know that I am doing better.The first few weeks after the 2nd bomb were very tough, and I was crying almost all day everyday. I have know noticed that by setting goals for myself, that I am doing much better. My gaols are: 1)to not cry and dwell on it all the time, and focus on me and more on my strengths, 2)To not talk about it with friends or family that often (as they all feel I should just move on and don't deserve this)and to show them all the happy me and not the sad and depressed version of myself, and 3) to keep my hope and faith alive, and know that deep down He does still love me but is just confused and in a MLC so he can not feel that love right now. Since I have focused more on these goals, and also cont'd to GAL, I have found that I have cried a lot less (I went for 3 days w/out a teardrop). I still have no contact with H(mostly due to him not calling/visiting at all and also due to me giving him space), and rarely see him out and about. Right now that's o.k. with me, but I wonder how long he will keep this avoidance up. Pretty much, he is avoiding everyone we ever knew-none of our friends or family have been in contact with him since the holiday. He seems to be indulging himself into his work and spending lots of time alone (i often see his car at his apt. when I am out visiting friends at night time). The GAL things i am recently doing: *haircut today, *going to a college b-ball game tommorow with the friend who is taking me to his company work party.*then Trivia Night @ a local restuarant *this weekend = bowling and going to the city night clubs with the girls. I am hoping to stay busy as much as possible to keep my mind off all the drama, I still have my down times, but they are getting easier. TIPPER
