Who will be my Du (dude) enna?

[fearless]

Mojo,

I'm having a hard time reconciling that the same man is responsible for these two posts from you.

FSG was calling me every night and I was cool with that because I enjoyed our conversations and the attention but I was in no way committed to an exclusive relationship with him and I made that pretty clear. The other night he said something to me like "I know you are less optimistic about this relationship than me because you never call me." So to me that seemed like he was feeling insecure and one-down and asking for reassurance.

I was talking to FSG last night and he said something about how it might be difficult to maintain such a long-distance relationship. I thought this was a sensible comment and said so and I mentioned how I thought it would be natural if he wanted to find a bar "where everybody knew his name" and expand his local social circle and perhaps find a more readily at-hand female. He responded by saying "Listen. I don't care if you don't want to claim me because I claim you." He kind of growled when he said it.

So from the first quote do you really think he was feeling insecure and one-down? Because the way you describe him in the following quote it doesn't sound like he is a guy who feels "one-down."

I'm just wondering in the first quote if you were looking for a puppy dog that wasn't really there. I'm not sure that he was really feeling one-down from what he said. He was just pointing out a fact - that you never call, and his explanation for it - that you are less than optimistic. To me, I don't necessarily "hear" insecurity in that statement. And then when you look at what he says in the second quote he certainly comes across as a confident man.

Anyway... It is certainly hard enough to figure people who post directly here on the board much less figuring out those about whom we post:))) My "concern" is probably more about what you are trying to see in the men you date. Whether it's looking for puppy, monkey, St. bernard or wolf!!